Saturday, September 27, 2025

HISTORY LESSON (SEASON 7)

 

Welcome to History Lesson, where we take a closer look at the movies that dare to tackle real-life events with varying levels of accuracy, drama, and WTF casting choices. These films promise to educate and entertain, but more often than not, they rewrite history with the subtlety of a sledgehammer. We’ll be your guide through the land of miscast biopics, dramatic embellishments, and historical “inspired-by” liberties, breaking down whether these flicks are Golden Reel Award-worthy masterpieces or just a big-budget Wikipedia summary. Either way, it’s more fun than your high school history class—and there’s popcorn.

This time around we will take a look at Season 7's fact-based slate....





HISTORY LESSON: PRESSING LUCK
Pressing Luck might be about a guy beating the odds, but the real gamble here is Wyatt Russell playing Michael Larson, an ice cream truck driver turned game show con artist. Russell nails Larson’s mix of scrappy charm and compulsive obsession, making you root for a guy who treats a VCR and a game show like the Holy Grail. The movie dives deep into Larson’s harebrained schemes, from memorizing the Press Your Luck board to spending $50,000 in singles chasing a radio contest - because nothing screams financial responsibility like hoarding more dollar bills than a strip club.

The film hilariously captures the absurdity of Larson’s rise and fall, with John Krasinski’s game show host Peter Tomarken nearly combusting on-screen as he watches Larson obliterate his precious game board. And yet, even as Larson racks up a record-breaking $110,000, his life spirals from small-town triumph to strip-club despair. The narrative teeters between comedy and tragedy, with Larson’s misadventures often feeling like a cautionary tale for anyone who’s ever tried to outsmart Vegas - or a radio DJ. By the time Larson ends up running a Ponzi scheme from his couch, you’re torn between laughing at his audacity and shaking your head at his inevitable doom. It's Quiz Show meets Tiger King, but with way more Whammies.





HISTORY LESSON: STAINED
Stained may sound like a political thriller, but it’s more like The Office meets a Greek tragedy. Matthew McConaughey’s Bill Clinton is part Southern charmer, part walking disaster, while Bel Powley’s Monica Lewinsky perfectly captures the naivety of someone who thinks her biggest workplace hazard is coffee stains, not presidential DNA stains. Watching Clinton’s sly “fried chicken over salad” routine in the Oval Office makes you wonder if we should’ve impeached him for his cholesterol choices alone.

The film hilariously balances the absurdity of the scandal with its devastating fallout. Allison Tolman’s Linda Tripp deserves an award for being the world’s worst “friend,” turning secret phone calls into her personal podcast. Meanwhile, Paul Giamatti as Kenneth Starr comes off as a grumpy dad disappointed that he found this in the family attic instead of corruption gold. As the chaos unravels, the supporting cast - Naomi Watts as a steel-nerved Hillary and Hank Azaria as a perpetually exasperated Leon Panetta - serve as a reminder that even the most powerful people can’t escape being caught up in one of history’s juiciest soap operas. It’s a wild, cringe-inducing ride with just enough saxophone solos to keep it classy.





HISTORY LESSON: RANGER
Ranger is a solid slab of frontier machismo soaked in gunpowder, sweat, and lots of historical revisionism. Joel Edgerton grunts and broods his way through the role of Leander McNelly, a real-life Texas Ranger turned cinematic folklore instrument, while Alden Ehrenreich plays a slick Easterner turned gunslinger who basically speed-runs a Clint Eastwood origin story. The film assembles a stellar cast - Oscar Isaac, Jason Momoa, Bryan Cranston, and Bill Pullman all show up looking like they wandered in from different Westerns - but Scott Cooper directs it with such earnest swagger that you almost don’t notice how much of this is completely fabricated. “Inspired by true events,” in this case, mostly just means “names and mustaches were borrowed.”

And oh, the historical accuracy: a rape revenge subplot that never happened, a conveniently cinematic cattle war that plays like Red Dead Redemption: The Movie, and a final act that has Richard King show up at dawn like the cavalry in The Two Towers. Still, Ranger has its pulp pleasures - bloody shootouts, righteous monologues, and enough leather to bankrupt a saddle shop. It’s a solid Western, that is committed to its myth. Just don't bring a Texas history teacher.





HISTORY LESSON: CLEOPATRA
Cleopatra is a film that dares to ask the question: what if Barbie’s energy was applied to one of history’s most fascinating women - but without the self-awareness, the charm, or any real grasp of narrative coherence? Directed by Guy Ritchie, who seems to think history is just one long montage of smoldering glances and sword-drawn standoffs, the movie staggers under the weight of its own self-importance. Gal Gadot stars as the legendary queen with all the gravitas of a fashion model in an eyeliner commercial. Her Cleopatra is less a brilliant political operator and more of a passive Instagram goddess, always shot in flattering gold light while men talk about the fate of the world around her. Historical power player? Not here - she mostly reacts to events, pouts with strategic concern, and occasionally murmurs things about destiny.

The script reads like a Wikipedia article written by someone who skimmed the page while watching Gladiator. It collapses decades into a blur of royal entrances, bedroom negotiations, and overwrought speeches that feel like AI-generated Shakespeare. Battles are filmed with the kinetic chaos of a perfume ad - loud, smoky, and unintelligible. Michael Fassbender tries to inject some life into Marc Antony, but even his scenery-chewing feels phoned in. Theo James, as Octavian, spends the whole movie looking like he’s fighting a migraine - and maybe he is. And yes, the infamous “rug reveal” is here, but treated with such po-faced seriousness it might as well be Cleopatra emerging from a coffin. For a story about sex, war, betrayal, and empire, Cleopatra is astonishingly lifeless - another attempt to mythologize a woman while completely missing her humanity.

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