COMIC BOOK GUY (SEASON 12)

 

Welcome to Comic Book Guy! This season’s crop of superhero films swings wildly from the sublime to the ridiculous. We’ve got time-traveling shenanigans, swamp monsters with feelings, and a perfume-themed superhero fighting her worm-dad in Paris. It’s a grab bag of ideas ranging from inspired to seriously, who approved this? So, buckle up—it’s going to be a wild ride.

SPAWN 2: PAYBACK

Spawn 2: Payback is what happens when you give a brooding antihero a budget, an army of mobsters, and Michael Chiklis as a cyborg tank. Antoine Fuqua directs this chaos like a serious Oscar contender, but at its core, it’s still about a demon in a cape sulking through alleyways. Ray Winstone’s Cogliostro tries to bring gravitas, but come on—this movie is at its best when Spawn is blowing up warehouses and leaving flaming corpses behind. A hellish good time, if you can forgive the melodrama.

CRIMSON FOX

Here’s the pitch: a French perfume heiress becomes a clawed superhero with pheromone powers while fighting her worm-monster father. Sounds cool, right? No, not even a little bit. Crimson Fox tries to mix superhero drama with corporate intrigue and ends up feeling like a daytime soap crossed with a bad cologne commercial. Alicia Vikander and Marion Cotillard do their best, but even they can’t save this mishmash of half-baked ideas, shoehorned cameos, and a Paris so grim it’s like Les Misérables with superpowers.

BOOSTER GOLD: LOST IN TIME

Finally, a superhero movie that embraces how dumb and delightful time travel can be! Billy Magnussen’s Booster Gold fumbles through history like your drunk uncle at a karaoke bar, and it’s glorious. The cameos (Nicolas Cage’s Superman, anyone?) and chaotic comedy are top-notch, but the movie still manages to pack an emotional punch. Rip Hunter’s “I’m your dad” reveal could have been eye-roll-worthy, but somehow it works. This is the kind of superhero movie that reminds us not to take these things too seriously.

SWAMP THING

Alec Holland is a man of science who becomes a walking salad with a soul, and somehow it works. Swamp Thing delivers gothic horror, killer visuals, and Ian McShane chews scenery like only the man who played Al Swearangen can. Sure, the plot occasionally gets bogged down (pun intended), but the grotesque creatures and environmental themes keep things creepy and compelling. Bonus points for the Constantine tease—it’s like the movie winked and said, “Don’t worry, more cool stuff is coming.”